"It's as country as cornbread"

I heard two new expressions last week.  One was an expansion of something I had heard many times before.  Somebody told me he may not be the sharpest knife in the drawer (that's the bit I'd heard before), but that he was good for more than just spreading butter!!

The other - "it's as country as cornbread" - was used to describe something we were going to experience for the first time - local drag racing.  I've known for many years that Michael harbors not-so-secret redneck tendencies, and here in Alabama it seems they have free reign.

Roger, one of our neighbours, and a really nice man, invited us to go the races last Friday night.  Roger runs a trucking company, and has a huge houseboat just down the dock from us.

When he invited us to join them, he warned us that it was "country as cornbread" which amused me immensely.  We think Scottsboro is country, so really had no idea what to expect.  So off we went, armed with a cooler full of beer and red plastic cups from which to drink it.

Have I told you that we have landed in a dry county?  Imagine that!  This is how it works.  The county is dry, which means that you can't buy alcohol.  However, the township of Scottsboro has elected to NOT be dry, except on Sundays.  So we can buy alcohol within the town limits from Monday to Saturday.  Beer and wine at Walmart and FoodWorld and the Piggly Wiggly, spirits at the ABC or Pinky's.  But I digress.

We headed off to the races, armed with a cooler full of beer and red plastic cups from which to drink it, and left the highway for single lane country roads until we reached Sand Mountain Dragway.  It's a two lane track, that draws anywhere up to 40 or 50 racers every Friday night.  There are junior dragsters (under 14 years old), guys driving souped up cars and pickups, and the pros who haul their cars in custom trailers and have their mechanics come with them!  Women compete head to head with the men, and there are one or two who frequently win!

Of course, our friend Roger is in the pro class.  Tonight, he and his son are running four cars between them, so they are very, very busy, and Michael and I are left to our own devices.

We got there early, but the crowd grew quickly.  They were of all ages - babies to grey hairs, and everyone seemed to know everyone else.  It truly seemed liked a big family reunion.  But then, of course, there was the noise.  We had to walk across the track to get from the spectator side to the competitor side, or to get to the concession stand or washrooms, so were right in the middle of it all.

Apparently, part of the art of drag racing is 'burning in' your tires.  Every car, before it gets to the starting line, sits and spins its tires to heat them up and increase the tire pressure.  This creates huge clouds of blue, smelly smoke - or is that testosterone I smell?



And did I mention the noise?  Thank goodness I remembered to take ear plugs!  But if I had forgotten, I would have been able to buy them here, along with Tylenol and/or Mylanta.  This is the first time I have ever seen this on a snack bar menu!









So here's how it works - at least from my perspective.  The track is 1/8th of a mile.  Two cars get to the start, spin their wheels and create a lot of smoke and noise, wait for the lights to go out and floor it....for about 6 seconds till they get to the finish line, when it's all over.  Does anyone else see any parallels to anything else here, or is it just me???  (I see another Captain's Log coming up, as Michael is sure to want to give you all his own side of the story!)

Turns out it isn't just driver against driver, or car against car, but they have to try to predict what their reaction time will be and how quickly they will cover the distance - and then they have to meet their own predictions.  So there is more than just driving skill involved.

Having said all this, I will say (very quietly so not too many people hear me) that I did have fun - for a while - and we will probably go back again sometime soon.  Could it be that those redneck tendencies are contagious?  Could I catch it just from prolonged contact?  I'll let you know :-)